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Forgiving Others: In Every Situation
By Anika Sandy-Hanson
“If hell
is what we are taught it is, then there will be more Christians there than days
in all creation” (Garvey 1923:27).
One commentator states that Marcus Garvey made this quote as an indictment of the lack of love and forgiveness shown by professed Christians. While it is true the principle of forgiveness is a central theme of Christianity, putting forgiveness into practice can be difficult…or is it? According to Jesus, we must make forgiveness one of the skills we not only acquire, but also perfect. As He always does, our Savior has also provided us with a strategy for success.
In Matthew 18:21-35 Peter asked Jesus if the typical stance on forgiveness was accurate. Harkening back to Genesis 4:24, Jewish culture believed that a good rule of thumb was to forgive between seven times and 490 times (seventy times seven) for premeditated sin. Religious leaders believed any amount of repentance above that was not genuine (therefore, we should not forgive the person past the number of times s/he is truly repentant). However, Jesus pushes the envelope and states forgiveness must be at least seventy times seven, or unlimited, and nowhere in His response does the Messiah mention repentance by the offending party as a consideration for our forgiveness.
Jesus’ response to Peter’s question gives us several cues to what forgiveness really means, why it is required of us, and how we can develop this ability. In order to expand on His initial response, Jesus uses a parable with several symbols (this would be a good time for you, the reader, to turn to this scripture so that you can read the word in the Bible while reading the explanation in this article). The wealthy “land owner” represents God, while the servants represent human beings, and debts owed are sins against God and others.
First, the parable reminds us one day we will be held accountable for our deeds, verse 23 states “accounts will be settled.” This caution should immediately remind us that our ultimate goal on earth must be to work towards salvation; therefore, time cannot be wasted holding grudges or allowing other people to serve as stumbling blocks in our walk with God. Think of treasure hunters of days gone by, sometimes they had to cut through thick jungles with annoying mosquitoes and other distractions on every side; yet, because they focused on their goal, these hunters simply flicked away the gnats and other creatures in order to attain the treasure they sought. Develop this attitude and forgiveness will become a little easier. When we realize the greatness of our final goal, salvation, shaking off hurtful people and forgiving them becomes easier.
The second point of this parable is made in verse 4; ten thousand talents were owed to the “land owner,” more than one hundred million days wages, an amount the servant could never repay. This verse shows us Yahweh is so generous He allows us more mercy than we could ever repay. We should forgive each other because God forgives us all.
In verse 25, the land-owner starts the process of collecting his debt by seizing all the servant owns and cares about; however, because the servant earnestly asks for mercy in the form of an extension (vs. 26), the master does not give him time to repay, but rather cancels the debt completely (vs. 27). This segment of the parable should be enough for us to realize we are always indebted to God and can never think someone else is too horrible to be forgiven. In order to quell any doubts Jesus then explains the extreme hypocrisy, foolishness, and consequences of human beings not forgiving one another. If, after we are forgiven more than a life-time of debt, we attempt to strong-arm an hours wages from our debtors, then our heavy debt will be restored with no hope of mercy (vs. 28-35). This consequence is one that we don’t want to face; thus, we must forgive others in light of God’s forgiveness and mercy towards us.
In fact, Jesus tells us we must not attempt to judge others and view their situations as repayment for sins. Rather, in Luke 13:1-5 Jesus tells His followers all human beings are due horrible consequences and can only avoid these judgments by focusing on their own repentance. In the Lord’s Prayer, Matthew 6:9-15, Jesus tells us to pray that God, “Forgive us our debts, as we also have forgiven our debtors.” This component of a simple prayer is so important that Jesus goes into more depth after the prayer. “For if you forgive men when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. But if you do not forgive men their sins, your Father will not forgive your sins.”
Whenever I still have a hard time forgiving someone I remember the story of Shimei and David in 2 Samuel 16:5-14, as David flees Jerusalem, from the coup of his son Absalom he is cursed by Shimei one of Saul’s relatives. While the rest of the group wanted to kill Shimei, the King stated that God may be using the man and that “It may be that the Lord will see my distress and repay me with good for the cursing I am receiving today.” Thus, we can also learn to endure the person who is a trial for us because Our Father may see our patience and repay us good for the bad that we receive.
In our daily walk on earth we will encounter both the best and worst of human thoughts and actions. Jesus showed us through His actions that the best way to live was by dwelling on the best in human beings, forgiving each other when we make mistakes, asking others to forgive us when we sin against them, and praying for our own forgiveness with sincere repentance. i
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