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From Russia With Love
By Brian Christensen
God created Adam and Eve, with thoughts of companionship, family, and future generations. These are heavenly things and blessings of God. Adam and Eve were fruitful and multiplied. Genesis 9:1 says God also instructed Noah and his family to be fruitful and multiply. Having children is a large part of our society and a blessing from God as a natural growth of families and mankind. What if we can’t have children or do not wish to have children? Does this mean we are ungodly or not blessed?
This issue can cause a tremendous amount of stress, anguish, and pain. This is especially true when we want to have children and cannot. It can also cause feelings of guilt and self-doubt when one does not wish to have children. It is important to note all of the feelings I just mentioned are evil and used as tools by Satan to tear us down. After all, why would Satan want a Christian family to grow? The biggest threat to Satan is the multiplying of Christians. He will prey on the weak, and a child is most vulnerable. Satan will attack embryos, fetuses, young children, teens, and do anything, which will prevent the creation of a baptized Christian. This is why God the Father and Jesus, our Savior take a special interest in children. Youth are innocent and easily victimized by evil. The best time for Satan to attack is before a being is formed. In Genesis, the story of Abram and his desire to have children, shows us how easily we can lose faith in God and let doubt lead us astray. Even though God had promised Abram a son, he still had doubts and felt compelled to conceive with Hagar.
If We Cannot Have Children Are We Punished?
I can say this with conviction, because I went through all of these feelings in my desire to have a larger family. My wife and I wished to raise more children, beyond our oldest daughter; however, we could not do this naturally. We spent a few years going through the in-vitro process. Our only successful round resulted in three embryos, which did not survive. We were devastated. At this point, our thoughts began to take us down a road of doubt. Why were we being punished? Why was God not answering our prayers? After counseling and talking to one another, we realized God was in control and we had to trust in Him. Our God is not vengeful and does not punish people without cause. Satan would like us to believe this, however, we must stand firm in the knowledge that God knows all things. Go to Him in prayer and believe His ways are always best. In Matthew 21:21 Jesus shows us the power of prayer.
Soon after this, a co-worker was talking to me about a similar situation he and his wife were going through. They were in the process of adopting a child from Ukraine. It was a long and difficult process, but their excitement and joy was amazing. We began to research international adoptions and decided to start a journey towards adopting two children from Russia. We spent eighteen months of “labor,” taking classes, filling out paperwork, meeting with social workers, receiving government clearances, and absorbing the expense of an agency. Our efforts were finally rewarded with our first trip to Russia. The people of Russia were wonderful and extremely helpful to us. We soon realized the differences between the U.S.A. and Russia were mostly language and governments.
Our journey took us to a southern region called Stavropol, where we visited two orphanages. Many of the children were ill or malnourished, however, their care was remarkable. The workers at the facilities had nothing, but gave their hearts to these unfortunate children. We endured through some difficult decisions and doubt. Then we were introduced to a one-year-old boy named Nikoli and a three-month-old girl. We chose these two children and flew back home to await the legal process and review medical information with our doctor. Our wait lasted a few months before we were notified to return to Russia for the court process. Nikoli and Lena became our children and fulfilled our dreams.
Trust and Obey
During our darkest time, we did not know God was denying us at that time because He was ultimately blessing two innocent children, who had not even been created yet! How wonderful and awesome our God is. This is why patience and trust in God is so important. When we desire something, or have doubts and fears, it can make us vulnerable to Satan. My wife and I wrestled over decisions to have children, the in-vitro process, and which children to choose. These decisions tormented us, until we realized, we could pray and place the burden with God. “Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest” (Matt.11:28). All we had to do was pray, accept and follow His decision.
There are also a number of people who do not wish to have children and feel wrong for being that way. Don’t let Satan play with your emotions of guilt. We are all given talents according to His will and parenthood may not be a talent for you. God does love and cherish little children, but He also loves you, whether you have children or not. Do not allow Satan to hinder your relationship and faith in God.
Trusting in God when we deeply desire something and do not know the final outcome is extremely difficult. The foundation of your faith is shaken and tested. I shared my story because it taught me how much I needed God and to have faith in Him. There are two Hymns we sing. One is titled “Trust and Obey,” and the other is “Where Ever He Leads I’ll Go.” These are not just songs to sing in church, but also words to live by. I don’t have to look any further than Nikoli and Lena to remember it. i
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