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Playing with Fire
By Sarah Hoeck
The Problem
Bitterness is the same thing as being resentful or cynical. And just like being angry and pessimistic, being bitter can never have a good outcome. Now, there are numerous stories from the Bible that would be good examples of this nasty nature. I could tell you about Cain and Abel, Saul and David, as well as Joseph and his brothers. But instead, we will look in the book of Esther at the story of Haman, the powerful man who had it all and see how a little spark of bitterness can grow into a deadly flame.
Haman was second in command. The only one greater than he in the entire kingdom was the king himself. And because of the fact that he was so powerful, everyone bowed down to him when he was near. Everyone, that is, except Mordecai. And because of this, a spark of bitterness was set off inside Haman. As the spark grew and grew, he began to imagine many evil things.
The more Mordecai ignored the fact that Haman was very powerful, the angrier Haman got. He got so irritated he was willing to kill an entire people just to get rid of one person he despised with every fiber of his being. For, he went to the king and told him about the Jews. Of course, he told him only bad things about the Jews, things he had made up so that the king would think they were a people that should be disposed of as soon as possible. After Haman’s speech, the king gave him his ring to seal the paper with so it would be considered official. So, Haman went and made the decree that all of the Jews in the kingdom would be destroyed. Even the little children and elderly were to be put to death.
Soon after, Queen Esther invited Haman to a banquet. Haman was so pleased that he was important enough to be invited to a banquet that only the king and queen would attend that he completely forgot about Mordecai and the Jews. The queen then invited him again to a banquet the very next day. Haman left the feast feeling very happy and proud of himself. When Haman saw Mordecai at the king’s gate, he saw that Mordecai did not stand, bow, or even move for him; that flare that started out as a spark burst out into very large flames.
Now, all of a sudden, with the evermore-powerful fire rising, the date when all Jews would be killed was not soon enough for bitter Haman. He went home and told his wife and friends about all his riches and accomplishments. But then, at the end, he told them that none of it mattered to him as long as Mordecai was there, at the king’s gate. He resented Mordecai so much that as long as he was alive there was no way Haman could enjoy everything he had. (Can you imagine that? Hating someone so much that nothing else can matter to you?)
So, his friends came up with the idea to build a gallows, and hang Mordecai on it as soon as the king gave his permission. Haman, because of his growing fire of bitterness, of course, agreed, and it made him very pleased. Not knowing that his anger was going to lead him to his demise, he had the gallows made.
That very night, the king couldn’t sleep, so he commanded the book of records of the chronicles be brought to him. And as they were read to him, he hears of Mordecai saving his life. So, he asks if anything had been done to honor Mordecai for his act. When told that nothing had been done to respect him, the king decides to summon Haman to help him decide what he should do to finally honor Mordecai. But, when the king asks Haman what he should do to the man he desires to honor, Haman of course thinks that he is the one the king is talking about. So, he comes up with this absolutely fabulous idea involving some royal apparel, the royal crown, a horse, and the act of being paraded around. Pleased with the idea, the king commands him to do all of what he had come up with to Mordecai.
Haman, needless to say, does not like this at all. This is the man he wants to hang, the man he can’t stand to even think of, the man that he absolutely resents. And now he has to go parade him around the city saying, “This shall be done to the man who the king delights to honor?” The flames are at their fullest. They have become a never-to-be-quenched fire that has overcome his entire life. But, Haman is not only overcome with bitterness and hatred, but also with grief. He rushes home and tells his wife and friends everything that had happened to him. But now, they have a different opinion. They say to him, “If Mordecai is the seed of the Jews, before whom you have begun to fall, you shall not prevail against him, but shall surely fall before him,” for they do not know it is already too late. The king’s chamberlains are coming to get him to bring him to the second of Queen Esther’s banquets. And they are also unaware that this shall be his last.
Everyone knows how it all ends.
Esther tells the king that if she has found favor in his sight, to save her life and the lives of her people. And when asked who wishes to do this to her, she points out Haman. The king leaves to the garden because he is so angry, and when he comes back, Haman has fallen on the bed Queen Esther was on. Of course, the king does not know that Haman is pleading for his life, but instead thinks that he is trying to force the queen unto him. When the king is informed about the gallows Haman made for Mordecai, the king then has him hung on them instead. And all this happened because of his extreme bitterness for one man, and the fire of bitterness that he let grow inside of him, when he could have easily put it out.
Some Solutions
In present day life, this problem should never really come up. But there are other things that cause a spark to ignite inside of us. Maybe you studied all week for that huge test, and the boy who never pays attention in class got a way better grade than you. Or maybe your friend starts dating the guy or girl that you’ve had a crush on since middle school. Maybe you were already going out with someone, and that person leaves you for someone else. It could be that someone doesn’t pay you the proper respect, calls you names, or is mean to you and hurts you in some way or manner.
So, what can you do to stop bitterness in its tracks? How do you stop hatred and not allow it to become an obsession that consumes your entire life, like Haman allowed it to develop into?
Of course, the best solution by far is to pray to God about it. He does know everything, and He can do everything. He can definitely help you with your problem. Develop a good relationship with Him. Talk to Him often. Tell Him about your problem, and how you need help with it. Either sooner or later, whenever He knows it’s best for you, the problem will just disappear off the face of the earth. Or He’ll help you through step by step until you reach the goal.
Another good solution is to talk to the person you’re feeling this bitterness toward. Tell them exactly what you’re going through, and why you feel the way you do. When you keep all of your emotions sealed up inside you, you allow them to grow bigger and bigger until they no longer can be diminished. When you talk about your emotions, especially to the person you’re having the problem with; it allows that door to open and some of that bitterness, or maybe even all of it, to flow right out of your heart.
There are many other ways to overcome that bitterness, but it all depends on what kind of person you are and what exactly you’re bitterness is about. But, no matter what the problem is, you have to overcome it. Don’t allow it to become your life. Life is only so long. You never know when it is going to come to an end. So, stop thinking about it. Move on. Don’t waste your time with something as rotten as bitterness. It’s definitely not something you want your life to be a part of. Look at Haman. He couldn’t even enjoy anything great he had because his life was overcome with that tremendous fire of his wicked bitterness. And then, his life was gone. i
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